Beyond the Myths of Parenting (1)

“Children are a gift from the Lord.”       Ps 127:3 CEB

Here are two myths of parenting: (1) Good parents always keep tidy homes. We think our house should look picture-perfect, so we get upset when our children turn it upside down. But an obsession with neatness can result in missing precious moments that never come again. Unintentionally, we teach our children that things—not people—are important. We instill the idea that keeping up appearances matters more than enjoying life together. The truth is, the house will be orderly sooner than you think, and quiet, and empty! So enjoy the disarray, the laughter, the spills and scrapes. Let the nicks and scratches on the furniture become memories of precious moments with little people who’ll grow up feeling loved and important to you. (2) Good parents must always be “right.” Writer and mother Ann Peterson shares an insight that struck while she was engaged in a run-in with her son. “Finally, through clenched teeth I managed to ask him, ‘Why must you always be right?’ He responded through clenched teeth (must have learned that from his father), ‘Because you always have to be right.’ I sensed God watching that moment. Words were unnecessary. I got the message loud and clear. From that moment on, being ‘right’ lacked the luster it once held for me.” The relationship with her son became less resistant, “something I’d have missed had I not conceded the need to be always right.” So choose your battles carefully! Good parenting isn’t about racking up “victories” and dishing out “defeats,” it’s about enjoying your family.

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